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Mila

Uncommon Grammar Mistakes

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by
Mila
, 02-04-2012 at 10:04 PM (523 Views)
Hey guys, I just want to say at the beginning that I'm not the best writer, nor do I really want to be "the best" (because personally to be the best, I feel like I would have to sacrifice a lot to get there, but let's leave it at that). My grammar isn't perfect, but I've noticed several re-occurring mistakes my friends and I sometimes make, so I want to share them with you.


1) Comma splices. These bug the hell out of me, but many of these go undetected to most people. Comma splices involve using a comma to join two independent clauses, which is basically putting two complete sentences together with a comma, and without a transition or conjunction word.

Things like:

"She glanced at me, her eyes were unreadable." or,
"The house on the corner of the street was unoccupied, the residents have moved away last summer."

Ways to fix comma splices:

"She glanced at me; her eyes were unreadable" or,
"She glanced at me, but her eyes were unreadable" or,
"She glanced at me and her eyes were unreadable."

"The house on the corner of the street was unoccupied because the residents have moved away last summer."
"The house on the corner of the street was unoccupied, due to the residents moving away last summer."
"The house on the corner of the street was unoccupied; the residents moved away last summer."


You can also use "although", "however", etc, after a ";". Whatever works for you!

--------------------------

When writing stories, my personal preferences are as follows:

1. Vary sentence lengths. After an exceptionally long sentence, have a few, short sentences - but not fragments! Avoid using fragments at all costs. Not only do they make the sentence incomplete, but they show a weak attempt to "hype" up the scene or to draw readers in. You can do so much more than using fragments.

2. Passive voice = no. Avoid using "was", "had", or any other verbs that can be eliminated to reduce the amount of "telling". Instead, change more of your sentences to "showing", which help ease the reader into the world you have created with your words.

i.e.

"She was going to jump, but she was scared." can be changed to:

"She froze in mid-leap. Her body refused to complete the motion and comply with her brain; either her body knew very well the danger of her action, or it just refused to obey her wishes." In these two sentences, we established that her mind and her body were two different "beings" - she wanted to do one thing, but the other refuses. It shows struggle with her mind and action, and with "she froze in mid-leap"... well, doesn't that catch your attention better than "she was going to jump but she was scared"?

If you want something else, it could be even be this:

"Jump? Or don't jump? The sudden hesitation in her leap ..." and so forth.

With "jump? or don't jump?" this thought shows that the girl is indecisive, which can be from her fear of heights. It also helps us get to know her process of thinking: does she act impulsively, or does she think before she acts?


3. Less is best. Sometimes we all go crazy with adjectives, adverbs, and sentences that just keep going on and on (not run on sentences). If you can say something in less words, all you're doing right now is padding your word count. In the end, after thorough editing, those words will still be removed. (or sentences). Don't confuse this with description - but try and format your dialogue and descriptions so they're not overwhelming a reader, one way or the other.

4. "It was as if..." or "it was as though". These types of sentences can help your text look more poetic or if you want to put metaphors, similes, etc cetera with the sentence, but overuse of these sentences just makes your text stink. (or personal opinion at least).

Instead of "it was as if the light had gone out... as though someone had switched off the sun like a lamp." you can say, to far better effect (in my opinion): "The comforting rays of the sun blinked out, snuffed out like a candle, one that had already reached the end of its life."



Hope this helps!

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Updated 02-04-2012 at 10:06 PM by Mila

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Comments

  1. Drea's Avatar
    I actually like passive voice, but only when it is used properly. Generally I utilize it for more drab sections before a part that needs the impact of active voice, or when I am intentionally trying to make something sound boring and unimportant. It's also good for scenes that need to have an element of mystery. I actually think that overusing active voice is incredibly annoying and not very poetic; passive voice is great for when you want to sound more sophisticated, in my opinion. It guess it just depends on the situation! I don't like "fluffy" writing that is full of metaphors, so I think that is part of the reason why I like passive voice.

    Different tastes, I guess? : )
  2. Mila's Avatar
    Yeah definitely, different tastes Everything works if it's used properly, and balanced with both passive/active voice in such a way it's not glaring out at you c: Now I'm wondering in what cases passive voice works ... hmmm, I guess I'll Google xD
  3. Drea's Avatar
    I think the main use of it is when you want the receiver of the action to remain the subject, for example, if you want to say a painting was stolen, you use passive voice (I just did lol.) In that case, it is important to keep the focus on the painting, right?

    I also forgot to mention that I was happy to see this blog. : ) I love writing so it was fun to read.
  4. Drea's Avatar
    I think the main use of it is when you want the receiver of the action to remain the subject, for example, if you want to say a painting was stolen, you use passive voice (I just did lol.) In that case, it is important to keep the focus on the painting, right?

    I also forgot to mention that I was happy to see this blog. : ) I love writing so it was fun to read.
  5. Hikaru's Avatar
    It was only last year when I realized how to use commas and semi-colons properly, and that was only because someone finally criticized me about this. I kind of hate the fact that it took so long for someone to tell me, since I developed a strange habit of using semi-colons too much a few months before the critique. I rarely get critiques, and for me, I find that a little annoying at times.

    I'm actually used to using Passive voice, I think. I started writing in past tenses, and been using it for a long time. Only recently I'm trying to use present tenses, and it's not really working. .3.

    Another thing: I actually use fragments at times, but I mostly use these when the character himself/herself isn't exactly the brightest. While it's not in first person, I am still telling it in his/her perspective, and so at times when I want to stress something in their point of view, I use fragments. I don't really mind when people do it either. It sometimes works, it sometimes doesn't. That's my opinion. XD

    I really enjoyed this post <3 You don't get to see something like this every day. :3
  6. Sapper's Avatar
    I'm impressed. Do you write for pet sites?
  7. electric_blue_kirby's Avatar
    Voice 1:

    She glanced at me; her eyes were unreadable
    Ugh, semicolons. Such a garish bit of punctuation. A sentence is generally better off without it. To quote Mr. Vonnegut
    Quote Originally Posted by Kurt Vonnegut
    Here is a lesson in creative writing. First rule: Do not use semicolons. They are transvestite hermaphrodites representing absolutely nothing. All they do is show you've been to college.
    (Although for what it's worth, perhaps contrary to that quote, I've had years worth of journalism professors tell me to never use semicolons.)
  8. Drea's Avatar
    Awww EBK I love semicolons, they add such vibrancy. JMO : )
  9. Mila's Avatar
    I think not to overuse is the key - don't over use semi-colons and use them when they're needed, and also to use passive voice and adverbs and adjectives sparingly, depending on the situation and type of writing you're doing (: @electric_blue_kirby . What I my line of thinking is, "if semi-colons are useless, why are they there in the first place?" Balance is important, though!

    @Hikaru - you can use active voice with past tenses, actually. Instead of "she walks to" you can write "she walked" instead of "she was walking to" but like @Drea said, it depends on where passive voice is used in context. Critics say that Steig Larsson's Millenium Trilogy has mediocre writing (I can see why) but sometimes it's easy on the reader if you write in passive voice and such. Depends on what you're trying to write. :]

    @Sapper , haha, no not at the moment. xD I write a lot of stories, short stories, et cetera, though :]
  10. Sapper's Avatar
    @Mila , ah I see! Any possibility you'd be interested in doing so?
  11. Mila's Avatar
    Hmm, I might be, @Sapper . But the thing is, I'm very busy with real life, so I guess, the farthest I can be "writing" for a site is freelancing work? I'd love to work for a site, but as it is, I am completely booked with volunteering, ECs, and projects of my own. xD I'm always up for taking on a new project as long as I can be sure I'll have time for it. :]
  12. electric_blue_kirby's Avatar
    Voice 1:

    @Mila For a point of consideration, though, if you want to pursue that line of thought, when's the last time you used an interrobang? (Or a SarcMark, if an interrobang isn't esoteric enough for this point) Semicolons don't literally codify nothing at all, but that doesn't stop many from considering them to be useless and ostentatious.

    @Drea To each their own, of course. Just putting the popular contrary opinion out there. Although I can't personally think of an instance where a semicolon would indeed produce the strongest sentence.